I have been in a reflective mood today. One of those days where you sit back and inventory your life. A day where I feel such peace and gratitude. A day where you are happy not to have any trials...even if for a day.
Since March, I have been dealing with a health scare. To the ones I down-played it to, yes busted, I really was scared. One that left me without much peace. It was always resting in the back of my mind, always there presenting itself, not allowing me to fully enjoy life.
This left me asking, why is it we worry with what we cannot control? For me, reliquinshing control is no easy task. It is such a false sense of security. I fight so hard for independence, only to fail myself because I do not have the capability to bring peace to my own life. And while declaring independence, I separate from God because I draw upon myself.
I have realized how much I need to trust God. If I really know he loves me, then I have to trust in Him and understand that what I may discern as something to be a bad situation, may in fact be good. And it was. I've learned more about trust, compassion, and love. I am physically, emotionally, and spiritually in a better place because of it.
I received word last week from my surgeon that all is well. And finally, I can breathe again.
I hate trials, but love what I learn from them. So while I sit in peace in the quiet of night...I know I can't relax, because the next one is around the corner. I'll need to build my strength.
"Live Your Life In a Way that When Your Feet Hit the Floor in the Morning, Satan Shudders and Says...'Oh, Crap...She's Awake'."
13 comments:
I am so glad things worked out well
Okay your like freaking me out! I'm glad you are doing better, but you were like freaking me out! Take good care of your self. I need your hilarious comments on my blog. They always cheer me up, and make me laugh:)
I am glad you are better. Please let me know if there is anything I can do for you. I miss your monthly visits!
Ok Jen, I had no idea you had a health scare. Some friend I am!!
It's true, though. There's always a quiet stillness before any storm. The trials that come into our lives are always the ones we can't ever imagine happening to us.
But the peace that comes from reliquishing control is so powerful. I loved this post. And I'm glad you're ok.
I don't know what you are talking about but "all is well" sounds good to me!!!
That quote is my new favorite and I think I'm going to steal it. What is it from?
I had been thinking about you and I am so glad you got good news. This post brought me to tears. It might have been the song playing in the background too. I miss you!! Can't wait to come home and visit with you more often!!
You know I was thinking about that the other day and meant to ask you about it. I am glad everyting is okay! I love, love the quote at the end of this post!! You are right rest up because something else is on its way.(I always feel unseattled like that) Thanks for putting it in words for me. You are a great writer. Have you ever thought about writing a book? hehe
Okay, so I'll admit it now: I was scared for you too. Not because I didn't think you'd be okay, because I knew you would be, but because I didn't want you to have to go through really scary things. And I didn't want to have to clean your house and make you dinner either.
Love you!
Yes, you are busted...I didn't even know you were going thru anything...I am glad to hear all is well!!!! And yes, the square dancing costume is available for Halloween....you will look great! :)
I am (I'll admit) just your friend's sister. I know you as "my friend Jen." I am glad that you are well, even though I don't know of anything going on. I also love that quote.It's from Sherri Dew, right?
I'm so glad that your testimony grew on times like these- it's great isn't it!
(I don't know if you remeber me, but I'm Bronwyn's youngest daughter... my husband and I recently starting a blog.) I'm trying to tract down family because I love looking a peoples family pictures- it makes me feel like I'm watching them grow up!) I put on private settings, so I need you email address.
Hey...that's great...we love tracking down family and 'blog stalking' them. Our email is jenjatan@hotmail.com.
We look forward to looking in on the Jones Family!!
I just read your blog...I'm a bit behind. You have been in my thoughts. I'm so happy that things are ok. You probably do not realize how much I think about you and your family. I want the best for you!
By the way...great anniversary blog. You need to come to UT and it will be better. :) :O Zion! Take care!
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