Breathe

I have been in a reflective mood today. One of those days where you sit back and inventory your life. A day where I feel such peace and gratitude. A day where you are happy not to have any trials...even if for a day.

Since March, I have been dealing with a health scare. To the ones I down-played it to, yes busted, I really was scared. One that left me without much peace. It was always resting in the back of my mind, always there presenting itself, not allowing me to fully enjoy life.

This left me asking, why is it we worry with what we cannot control? For me, reliquinshing control is no easy task. It is such a false sense of security. I fight so hard for independence, only to fail myself because I do not have the capability to bring peace to my own life. And while declaring independence, I separate from God because I draw upon myself.

I have realized how much I need to trust God. If I really know he loves me, then I have to trust in Him and understand that what I may discern as something to be a bad situation, may in fact be good. And it was. I've learned more about trust, compassion, and love. I am physically, emotionally, and spiritually in a better place because of it.

I received word last week from my surgeon that all is well. And finally, I can breathe again.

I hate trials, but love what I learn from them. So while I sit in peace in the quiet of night...I know I can't relax, because the next one is around the corner. I'll need to build my strength.

"Live Your Life In a Way that When Your Feet Hit the Floor in the Morning, Satan Shudders and Says...'Oh, Crap...She's Awake'."

Beach House Bums

We are glowing. Not just for the fact that we had some R & R, but because of our sunburns. We spent the last couple of days with friends at Newport Beach. Of all the things we miss about California, the top two are friends and the beach. Jason grew up surfing and when we got married he introduced me to all the ocean has to offer. It does remind me a bit of Disneyland. You wait in the water for that one perfect wave to come, which lasts 5-10 seconds, and then it's all over and back to waiting. We had great water, up to 6 ft. waves, which for Newport is decent. I had a few that knocked me around enough that it seems I still taste salt. The kids are old enough now that they really enjoy the beach. Brynna and Nathan both were on the boogie boards and are now almost too trusting of the ocean. Seeing them run and play, being free, brings great joy to me as a mom.

Our friends had both upstairs and down rented for the week, which made room for more visitors. On a side note, we were neighbors to a 90 year old man who was the inventor of hot dog on a stick. We didn't honor him very well by grilling pork, chicken, and tri-tip. We ate so well and after burning so many calories, seemed to eat all day long. I was introduced to yellow watermelon. It was delish! Unfortunately, it will be back to hot dogs at home.

It was another vacation we'll remember forever. We made great memories. Some of which were: card games with the worst stakes of a universal M and M, track ball, 'haunches', 'Phelps', hour long reads of a paragraph, 'springy' beds, psycho boogie boarders, male dominant remote controllers, teflon syrup, drunk arrests on the beach, 'olive juice', and many conversations in the ocean. :)

We miss you all already!

Lucky 7's

I was born 7 pounds, 7 ounces on the 7th of August. With all of those sevens, you would think odds would always be in my favor. Yet, I seem to get in the slowest lines in grocery stores, I am quite a clutz, I got the serious health issues in the family, red lights whenever I am in a hurry, I never get picked in drawings, and it seems I have to work harder for things that come easier to others.

But sometimes it just takes having a special occassion to make a person realize how lucky they really are. To go along with the sevens, somehow I manage to stretch my birthday for about seven days. We laugh because while mine lasts 7 days, Jason's lasts about an hour. He never complains, and I have gotten dinner dates twice this week with gifts he promised not to get. I was taken to lunch by my wonderful visiting teacher, my great friend Steph, and my amazing presidency. I recieved calls, notes, and visits by family and friends; some who are in poor health and should be taking care of themselves. (The cake was awesome, Tina.) I'd have to say the thunderstorm was icing on the cake. So thank you, thank you my friends who make me feel special and help me to realize just how sweet life can be. Although I dread getting older, I have never felt more lucky to be alive.