I Don't Always Meet Celebrities...But When I Do, I End Up Looking Like a Loser

I LOVE the entertainment industry.  I love musicians, movies, television, etc. but I'm not a typical 'star struck' person. I'm too empathetic maybe.  I think, geez, they're just people, let them be so they can enjoy their dinner without getting their picture taken, signing autographs, or hear a 10 minute story about how their work has changed your Aunt's life.  Apparently though, I need to be a little more star struck because every time I meet a celebrity, it goes wrong and if anything, I probably remind them why they do what they do in order NOT to be the ordinary Joe Schmo.   Some examples of  my run-ins:  I've hit Seth Green with my stroller, I've had Paul Meany come down from the stage with his microphone to sing a song with the crowd and get right next to me (like the Bruce Springsteen/Courtney Cox video) and I briefly forgot the words, I tried telling Thomas Mars a joke that ended up reversing and made me the butt of the joke, we all know how my run-in with Henry Winkler and Daniel Silva went, and alas my most recent with Anna Kournikova.   I was invited to a Championship Tennis Tournament of some of the great pro tennis players of old (Sampras, Chang, Courier, Philippousis, etc) which occurs each year in an effort to raise money for cancer centers.  I get the VIP section due to my status of 'elected official' so I get to rub shoulders with some great people.  I was thrilled with this tournament because I was excited to meet and schmooz with Pete Sampras, my date for the night but alas, he ended up with an injured soldier and had to back out destroying all the photo op's of him kissing my hand and cheeks I had planned for the evening. The Mayor was making her rounds and had a crew with her, one of which was Anna, but unfortunately when my table full of high rollers asked who the blonde was, my response was, 'oh, that's the Mayor's daughter.'  #$&!!*&$# In my defense, she looked different in person, the Mayor does have a daughter and Anna looks like she could be hers. They approach Jason and myself and so I'm being overly casual (because I have a great relationship with the Mayor) therefore to her and Anna I'm saying things like, 'Don't you feel like you're in a wedding line with all these pictures??  Plastic permanent smiles when all you want to do is take the gifts and run!!'  I've been replaying that idiotic conversation in my head and go between cringing and chuckling. What a L-O-S-E-R!  Finally, we are formally introduced and so I do the only damage control I know how to do: pretend that I knew all along.  She was very sweet, of course lovely, and an easy conversationalist.  We talked tennis and life of being in our 30's, we both have health issues.  By the end of the conversation, she's running her fingers through my hair.  True story.  I haven't washed it since.  Ok, I waited a day. Moral of the story, if you ever want to meet a celebrity and make a good impression, don't accompany me.  I keep thinking of  all those poor people at my table who didn't take the opportunity to meet and shake hands with Miss Kournikova because they're all like, 'eh, it's just the Mayor's daughter.'